Our Surrender Experiment
Recently, our great, spiritual, friend Suzette recommended we both read Michael Singer’s book, The Surrender Experiment: My Journey into Life’s Perfection. I just read it and Henry’s just about to. It’s a captivating picture of how often, by surrendering to what showed up in his life, the author was able to see how the Universe, or God, had a perfect plan for him. He figured out that by staying out of the way or trying not to control anything, and certainly not listening to the “voice in his head,” everything worked!!
I encourage everyone to read this book!!! I’m using it as the basis to share how surrendering to how the perfect sequences of events in Henry’s and my lives actually brought us together 🙂
From the time I was 23 on, one thing after another fell together for me. I would get jobs that I wasn’t looking for, each job that I had was the perfect one for later career moves… nothing was a mistake. I lived fully and time and again, miracles happened that kept assuring me that if I put all of “me” into my life, amazing stuff would happen. I used to, and still do, love to share my story with young people as an inspiration. I never had a plan and yet, so many things worked out better than I could have ever planned!
It was many years later that I read The Celestine Prophecy which started me on the road to discovering more about synchronicity and how to tap into how stuff “worked.”
When Henry was 21 he had a good friend who suggested reading The Celestine Prophecy. The friend disappeared one day and a year and a half later his body was found. The loss was painful to Henry and he was inspired to read this book that had meant so much to his friend. It was the beginning of Henry’s interest in synchronicity and how things “worked.” Intrigued, he moved on to read Synchronicity by Dr. Kirby Surprise and then The Secret by Rhonda Byrne which is about “The Law of Attraction.”
Our experiences are important to mention because without our lives happening as they did, we would have never met.
I needed to be open to every experience or I would not have texted Henry back after I learned I had the wrong number. Henry needed to be into the Law of Attraction and mention it in a subsequent text for me to find him intriguing. He needed to tell me he was young and trying to figure out his life’s path for me to want to meet him and inspire him from my life’s successes. During the first week of texting and emailing before we met, there were countless times when one of us would ask the other a question that we were just about to ask!
The second time we met we each ordered the same obscure coffee and we were pretty cemented by then.
But the synchronicity would continue to happen.
Henry was teaching himself to code and shortly after we met, he quit his job selling paint at Lowe’s (where, by the way, he had found a great spiritual mentor in Leroy, a co-worker.) He had just moved in with me and although I was willing to cover food (and beer) for us, he was going to need money to live. He looked hard to find a job and filled out countless applications to no avail. Finally a month or two later, he had an informational interview at a local digital agency and at the end of the interview they offered him an unpaid internship for 3 months. This would be perfect for his career! But what about the student loan, insurance payments etc.? At the same time, he got a letter from Lowe’s with information about the value of the 401k he had started there. If he cashed it out, it would be exactly the amount he needed to live for those 3 months.
At the end of the 3 months, he was brought on to the agency for a minimal salary for another 3 months.
2 months later we were considering moving into a new apartment together but weren’t sure where or how much we could afford. At the exact same time for the first time in 6 years I received a notice from my apartment management that I needed to make a decision to re-sign my lease or move out and they gave me only a few days to decide! So we had to make a huge decision about our future without knowing if Henry would have a job going forward or if he would be able to afford to pay half the expenses.
A few days later we learned that one of the most perfect 2 bedroom apartments in our complex was available. We decided to go for it, feeling that everything would work out, and indeed the week we were to move into the apartment, Henry got a raise and it was exactly the amount he needed to be able to pay his own bills and share in ours!!
That was just the start. Too many things to write have occurred in perfect synchronicity over the last 3 years.
Fast forward to September 30, 2015 when our article came out in the local paper which went viral in 24 hours. With Facebook friend requests coming in from all over the world, Henry built us a joint Facebook page so we could effectively connect with everyone. And at that point it hit me that we might do a blog. I’d always wanted to write about our life together but couldn’t figure out how we’d build a following. Well, we suddenly had one!
We have been writing now for about 6 months and try to do at least one blog post a week about our relationship or something that has inspired either one of us or both of us. In addition to the blog, we stay in touch with people who write to us on our Facebook page and make occasional posts about things we think will be fun or interesting. Professional bloggers who we know have told us how much work this would be. It is very time consuming but more than that, sometimes we’re not entirely sure what to write about or especially if what we’re writing is any good. But we have this way of looking at life that is all about taking the amazing thing that’s in front of us and putting everything we have into it. Because we’ve had one experience after the other in our lives together and separate that have let us know that stuff “works.” When something shows up, like Michael Singer suggests, surrender to it because you have no idea what it’s going to lead to.
“Life rarely unfolds exactly as we want it to. And if we stop and think about it, that makes perfect sense. The scope of life is universal, and the fact that we are not actually in control of life’s events should be self-evident. The Universe has been around for 13.8 billion years, and the processes that determine the flow of life around us did not begin when we were born, nor will they end when we die. What manifests in front of us at any given moment is actually something truly extraordinary—it is the end-result of all the forces that have been interacting together for billions of years. We are not responsible for even the tiniest fraction of what is manifesting around us. Nonetheless, we walk around constantly trying to control and determine what will happen in our lives. No wonder there’s so much tension, anxiety, and fear. Each of us actually believes that things should be the way we want them, instead of being the natural result of all the forces of creation.” Excerpt from Michael Singer’s The Surrender Experiment